Commenting on the 4th Reich Clown show: Pseud-diary entry: health issues stemming from poisoning. I realize how badly the poison was supposed to crush me from inside my body as I am at the hard "center" of the poison "shelf" completely hard, and so hard I can pound my fist on it and it makes a slight thudding echo sensation. Hard as cement or rock. But it "glides" off with excessive effort on my part with multitudes of attempts and healing modalities I can barely afford and all out of 'gestimation" on how to get rid of tis thing. Many times in the past but today in particular I have had a heart "crushing" sensation. I can tell the difference between the remote heart palpitations and the hard poison in my thoracic region which, when I get rid of some more of the layers of poison, begins to shrink down to my core and settle as deeply as possible. If there is any kind of "alien" monster in the DNA structure of this by now almost sentient chemical hard shell it has the propensity to sink into the lowest depths possible and find a way to "hide" so as to remain feeding off my body and blocking function. My heart muscle(s) are extremely pressurized and it feels like a mini-serious heart attack. It happened as I was bending slightly to wash a glass in the sink and the bending posture aggravated the thin layer between my thoracic hard shell which is not confined to the back area of that region but is intertwined into the cavities of my upper chest/thoracic and rib cage. My heart being compressed and once this was aggravated no matter what posture or laying down I did and deep breathing, it was a near heart attack or some kind of serious threat to the functioning of my heart. I realize that the ultimate goal of this organization was completely bodily shut down after I had become HUGE and deformed. The H-wood celebrity 4th Reich ensured that this poisoning (and subsequent endless rape while I was unable to tense my body to try to negotiate internally the impact and brunt force of huge hormone-growth violent hateful abusers who were also beating me at the same time). All under instruction they did this, with lavish warm caresses from ugly dirty cesspool-whoralina and co. Disgusting always in every way. Yet still, they are "worshipped" and truly have been programmed to "believe" that they are royalty absolutely above all law, and t his has been supported by awards and money pouring into their projects and lives and their nepo-sapwn also being promised a future of endless lead roles and producer slots--instead of that old Capitalistic "land of opportunity" "loser" system by which they cannot win so they have to have this system in order to not be "losers".//After not just that but years of them stealing my ideas and ordering their violent Nazi minions and partners to server part of my uterus out, break my toe, inject silicone under my skin, make most of my hair permanently fall out, saturate my skin with damaging chemicals and poison my food and put fungus in my food, clothing, hair, into my body via injections while I'm in a comatose MK ULTRA sleep state--and more and more and more plus my immune system always being in a "fight or flight" shock mode every day for hours as the endless rotation of haters comes to violently threaten and abuse me to get their endless promotions.//They all claim that I am nothing they are everything. Some of them now are scared but only in front of cameras about the "threats" the trump campaign is making about cutting off any media personalities or anyone who challenges the instant gratification right to mutilate, violate all law, steal rob rape and plunder and murder and put incompetent hateful violent criminals in power (it's already been happening for decades in that respect but hidden until now). //and I recall the years of me writing that people who are joyously rushing to attack me will ONLY realize how sinister this system is, when they themselves become threatened. I wrote that it would happen. I was tortured raped poisoned beaten abused without end fighting constantly for my life as a result. They people who attacked me are still playing "domi9nant' and "You are nothing" roles when they teleport me with absolute CIA-manual training in mind programming with trauma and niceties interspersed.

 **On the same old sour note (F-Major/minor) of yet ANOTHER celebrity who has participated in this murder contract upon me with full glee  has been "awarded" in the past two days. I used to watch his show when I was very young and there were three channels available. I could write more very biting comments but it would sound too "victim" like on my part. But here goes anyway (F-Major):

a camp counselor at Indian Acres somehow "befriended" me when I was 7 years old, and on swimteam. They used a terrorist construction to get him to "rescue" me during a swim meet when the referee (? not sure what the name of the person who stands in front of the swimmers on the blocks, who blows the whistle to begin the race) but the whistle was blown and accordingly I jumped into the water and began sprinting  in freestyle. I heard subsequent whistle-blowing but could not understand that this was supposed to be a "foul" and somehow I had "jumped" the whistle and the race had to be stopped. I knew that I had not jumped ahead of the whistle and I recall all like a clear vision to this moment. This guy, his last name Van Dyke (Lyndell I believe his first name was) had the same name as this entertainer and also had a goofy comedic behavior towards me, which was silly but also sneering with bits of humiliation appearing like silly "jokes". He would grab he and hold me head down above the swim pool while I was fully dressed and dry like it was a joke.

I was told by my "Handler" mother that he was a great guy.. She (my mother) encouraged me to have a "crush" on various older men while I was 7 years old. At 13, I recall that after Lyndell had left for a while (to go to university, he was around 17-18 when he began to be a sexual predator towards me, using my sleep MK ULTRA mode for some pedo-rape which my family sold me out for) that is my supposition. I remember that I was 13 and at the pool lounging---and he came to say "hi" completely sweating and nervous like a body reaction of hormonal havoc. I thought he was acting strange and was polite. That was almost the last time I had contact.

In the aftermath of all these years I have realized that my mother did sell me out to pedophiles to be raped while I was in a deep sleep state. I was always drugged as a child as well. The situation has never changed since then.

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And likewise, this childhood memory of a comic who partnered in silly shows and none of which I can recall except that it was slapstick and I had no other choice at that time of day except for soap operas. 

And now this same type of man with the same last name has "won" after about a half month of his videos hacked onto my YouTube channel like about 400 other celebrities, politicians, terrorists, Youtube podcasters and etc (maybe it's "only" at 300, it seems like an infinite number after 14 years of this going on every day.

And he's a perverted scumbag working for a fascist Nazi overtake or really he does not care. He's on his way to infinity and he got  his last "award" for his participation in a terrorist regime of the 4th Reich, like so many others have done and are still doing.

All these ideas have coalesced after having seen his glowing smiling face in the media, this person whose home videos I watched and was fascinated, really not award how completely sinister the creeple hacking their "stuff" onto my youtube and social media truly are, but heinous as Hell and that's no joke.

Silly and dumb wacko clowns and their obverse the terse sinister bigots really double-sides of the same coin.

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I realize that this kind of personal revelation is not "supposed" to be put out there in the void of the internet. The expletives are supposed to be "protected" endlessly.  My mother was a "feminist" who has made "Wikipedia on the list of influential women who pushed for feminist legal reform. She defended abused women in court and for child support. She tried to get Hillary into office and was on the Phoenix Hillary for President committee and there is a photo of my mother standing in a line of women with Hillary in the middle. My mother can be seen in another photo dining with Gloria Steinem.

She yelled hysterically at me the last time I spoke to her back in around 2013. I was being raped to death via the teleportation by the same group which has just come after 30 years to inflict absolute crushing oppression upon me to death. My mother was defending them because from all her public fights she obtained a beautiful house living next to Europigapes and white influential Nazis and had a beautiful swimming pool, had her office in downtown Phoenix, was awarded obtained a Judge position was complimented paid and died in agonizing pain from "cancer". She essentially was "suicidal" and allowed her body to go to Hell and she told me this in so many words. She tried to re-establish ties to me back in 2016 or so but I had enough of a lifetime of her cognitive dissonance.

I do not put the blame necessarily on my mother. I have to state that for Jews the price for "success" is a blood sacrifice, of oneself or one's family, one's pride and one's sense of selfhood.

I find none of these celebrities entertaining or silly or funny now. I did not speak to my mother yet I was in no way rejecting her, she had been so drugged, so poisoned, and was aware of it and yet the structure she had obtained her "right of passage" from demanded her compliance or her death. She was poisoned to death anyway.

So, the goddamn celebrities being awarded and praised the black liberals the white feminists the silly comics the fascist Nazis to me are just like John Wayne Gacy with a sick clown mask that conceals a truly despicable mass murdering bigot underneath.

My mother always wore a huge disgusting fake smile it looked so sinister you could see her ravaged soul underneath the fake smile. 

What my family never reveals is the absolute personality alteration that my mother and step-father both displayed after they were ordered to be separated and re-marry Nazi antisemites who would "control" them and drug and poison them into compliance so they could not have happy beautiful Jewish children but instead broken in spirit slaves operating as minions filled with hate and taking it out on their sister or anybody else possible to get a promotion. 

My mother had, I heard, a real nervous breakdown (Geneseo, NY) and was taken to the hospital by ambulance. I heard this, it was hinted at by my family but I was not around her at the time (in Wisconsin dealing with a fascist Nazi spouse of my biological father who was so absolutely mind programmed to obey and allow for poisoning and abuse of me and also sneering humiliation and antisemitic jokes by his Nazi wives who were out shopping with his money as often as possible while they insulted him non-stop in every way--his manhood in particular). My mother was the "mistress" to the bigot "Italian-American" man next door in a cul-d-sac in which the relatives of this man attacked me very openly in the school I attended. My mother had a complete personality shift and she became almost  unrecognizable to me and I know she was bloated and had similar symptoms of the poisoning that I know all too well from my own, which she herself administered for the sake of her future "success" and allegiance to this Nazi organization which "allowed" all my parents to attend Ivy League schools.

Now I am confronted with people who have almost no education who are criminals and appear to just be paid 4th Reich minions yellin about how I have nothing who do you think you are--as the celebrities join in with vicious demands to just give my life for their pig ape movies and careers and that of their nasty filth spawn. 

after they have stolen idea after idea from me and had me poisoned and insulted how my body looked as i could not defend myself against any of it.

This system is still being awarded and put into every position possible. Now that Trump is threatening mass murder and to eliminate the people who have made outcries against his ravaging of the country just as he had people ravage me just as he ravaged me just as they all ravaged me and no one gave a f-ing damn--now it's happening to them. How funny and entertaining are the clowns and skank posturing bs prostituted scum you all worshipped and performed your acts of hate upon me so you could be assured a higher promotion for your media act about how much you are against fascism and anti-Democratic tyranny?

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5 minutes later: having walked away from this mind control spot in front of the laptop, I realize that I had not written a key component of how Lyndell Van Dyke first made physical contact with me and obtained a "trigger" and physical intimacy with me in a fake sense of "trust' which turned into more touching and "playing" but I was at camp at the same time so it was in public and disguised as "horsing around".

The whistle blew, I sprang to the water to race, I was sprinting and he swam and grabbed me and held me and held me in his arms (he was 17-18) until he brought me to the swimmer's block again. 

The whistle had been blown correctly I began the race completely correctly. It was a ruse and it was part of the terrorist organization. It has followed me everywhere all my life, and now from this nebulous source of the internet and the media. 

But now that there are no people around who could report misconduct, the gates of sadism, torture rape and callous indifference and thrill of torture and attempted murder along with what so many people now afflicted by the MAGA 4th Reich have experienced--death threats, and this has been ongoing for years but no one could give a goddamn. They all thought it was fun and great when it happened to me. How antisemitism is fully ingrained in the psyches of The universal 4th Reich mentality.

I do not exonerate my mother either, but my meager compassion towards her is due to how I know she did care and was torn in part and drugged and mind controlled and told that if she didn't want to be abused by the Jewish men she had married, who also subsequently nearly worhshiped the Nazi skank women who just stole his money and my inheritance as well---and the same pattern goes on and on in Whorewood and it runs throughout the Jewish diaspora in multiple but similar ways (and means then into Congress in the same exact way)

But my heart is feeling better. The poisons have adjusted and are not compressing my heart any longer. I hope no more celebrities who have attacked me will not be awarded any longer. If any o f you reading this understands that my admonitions about this organization which I have grown-up around alll my life and so know that it's a murder operation and will also kill anyone of any skin, hair and ethnic background if they are "in the way" of their exploitation global 4th Reich.

Maybe people will STOP thinking this situation of me being beaten raped and tortured as well as my family being forced into a labyrinth of experimental design social engineering to ensure that the Old World of Nazi Holocausts and Pogroms continues in the United States and that the Jews are crushed and  will have no chance unless they fully and only support white supremacy and the 4th Reich. In which case, they are slated to be eliminated once the power structure no longer requires their vicious sell-out sacrificial soul-destroying overtures of begging for acceptance if only to live in the "white" privileged part of town but still have to commit all kinds of antisemitic acts in order to assure that they really are just Nazis anyway.\

The sleazy and sinister clown performances are so much more sinister to me, just as John Wayne Gacy really was a mass murdering sick monster underneath the fake cheery appearance of normalcy and "fun" acts of "silliness" The humiliation jokes and sneers disguised as "silly" jokes turn so easily into covert poisoning and assassination.